fairylights-

it’s not that nothing is the matter; it’s not that there’s nothing wrong. 

it’s just that if i were to tell you everything that is wrong, i’m afraid that you would judge me. there is so much to say anyway, and you wouldn’t want to hear it all. to a certain extent you’re concerned but to a larger extent you’re just being polite. you’ve probably heard half of what i’m about to say anyway.

in fact, having heard all my previous rants, you probably think that i’m crazy moody and will roll your eyes as i start talking about my problems again, because to you they’re trivial and unreasonable to worry so much about. 

i’m sorry for having ever troubled you to listen to all i had to say in the first place. and i’m sorry in advance for all the times in the future that i won’t be strong enough to smile through the sadness, and end up pouring out all of my feelings to you. 

thank you for being there to listen to everything that i have to say. you’re a wonderful friend, yet for some reason there’s a paranoid voice in my head that tells me you’re plain sick of hearing what i have to say. 

so i’ll smile. nothing’s wrong, i’m fine. let’s not talk about me. how are you?

1. fairylights- posted this